Month: March 2015

#MicroblogMondays: The Waiting is the Hardest Part

Waiting by Edgar Degas

Waiting by Edgar Degas

Tom Petty was right, waiting sucks. I’m waiting on what feels like a million things right now.

Waiting for more time.

Waiting for some quiet, some peace.

Waiting for healing.

Waiting for answers.

Most pressing on my mind right now is my waiting to hear back from the doctor. My youngest has an apparent compression fracture and needs an MRI to confirm and proceed with treatment. She is in pain and we’ve just been getting through the days of discomfort as best we can. Pain plus boredom can quickly breed sadness and anger. I’ve been trying to keep her spirits up with plenty of hugs and whatever I can come up with to get her mind elsewhere. (Special thanks to video and board game creators, movie makers, authors, singers and songwriters. Also, coloring books, television, Mother Nature, and candy!)

At night, I dream of vacations and extended moments to myself. I imagine writing, reading, sleeping in, exploring… Oh, to be alone with my thoughts! And without the creeping worries that have followed me around as of late? What would that even be like? I have no clue. It’s nice to consider, for a moment, until reality slaps me right back into place. Did I mention my $900 in car repairs I found out about last week? I nearly made a joke about the camel and its broken back, but it was too close to home. Sigh.

The past few months have been so rough, I can’t help but wonder when the clouds will lift. I want magical band-aids to make all the woes and pains of my children to go away. I’m an optimist struggling to keep things afloat. I hope that along with spring slowly making its way to us, so will easier, quieter, calmer, happier times for us. Until then…

Special thanks, as always, to Stirrup Queens. I was sifting through medical bills and waiting for a doctor’s call, when I remembered it was Monday, and that means time to microblog! I feel better having put these words (more than 8 sentences…) down.

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#MicroblogMondays: The Kindness of Others, or, My Sister is the Best

fromDeniseAs I’ve alluded to in my last two posts, life here has been difficult over the past few months. Through all the sleepless nights, heartaches, and challenges, few certainties remained. One of those was the kindness and support of my eldest sister. She continually lent her support, in phone calls, text messages, social media pick-me-ups, packages, and notes in the mail. She lifted up my spirits and brought smiles to my girls all the way from the Northwest.

Just a couple of days ago, she sent another package to my daughters. Inside, there were two bins full of self-care items: lavender-scented heating pad, soft aloe-infused socks, lip balm, mints, a sock monkey, and other goodies. My sister also included a package of their favorite snacks for each of the girls. She also found, printed, and cut out dozens of positive affirmations that I can tape to their snacks and place in random spots for them to find. The time and care it took to make these really touched my heart.

I’m so grateful for her, and her never-ending generosity. The world would be a much greater place if everyone acted a little more like her.

A big thanks to Stirrup Queens for making Monday mornings one of the easiest times to write. Join us!

Homeschooling on the LAM: And here we go…

Our version of homeschooling, basically.

Our version of homeschooling, basically.

We dove into homeschooling this week. We being my 14-year old and I. It was a week of creating lesson plans on the fly when a book didn’t arrive in time or a program we thought would be great wasn’t. We discovered many resources. It makes me applaud those brave parents who homeschooled before the internet was overflowing with lesson plans and curriculum ideas! There literally are more ideas and help out there than I ever imagined.

We tried Time4Learning a bit today, but most of the week was work I created. I was impressed with my daughter’s response; she was focused (something she’s been challenged by as of late) and dedicated. She’s always been an eager learner and curious about the world. Life circumstances brought us here, but she was already a prime candidate for homeschooling. We are both happy about it.

I thought I’d be more nervous. At times, I felt a little, “wait, what have I signed up for?” Truly though, as we worked through the week, it all seemed so natural. She was happier and healthier, I discovered an abundance of support, and we just hit a smooth flow within a few minutes of saying on Tuesday morning, “okay, time to learn.”

I’m still contemplating a separate home for these posts. If it ends up I have extra time (ha, good one!) and am able to dedicate that to sharing my resources, tips, and lesson plans, I will do that elsewhere. Otherwise, and for now, I’ll be sharing our journey here from time to time. Taking on this challenge has reminded me of how capable I am, and that following my instincts as a mother has never failed us.

I have thoughts on my decision, the reactions of others, homeschooling as a single mom, on the public school system, and so much more. If these first couple of days are any indicator, the political and personal reflections will be plenty. For now, I’m tired and can think only of my pillow! I head to bed with a huge sense of relief. We not only survived the first week, we rocked it. I know we’ll face challenges and bumps along the way (hell, we had a few this week!), but I really feel this is what we should be doing now and there is a great peace in that.

Back from the depths…

meOWLHello there. Yes, it’s really me. I hope I’m back more regularly, we’ll see if the universe behaves. The past few months have been hectic, emotional, and tiring. I’ve learned just how strong I am, and how resilient those closest to me are. Through health crises, long nights in the ER, and downs outnumbering the ups, we are all still here.

I haven’t written for two reasons. The first is the time and energy required to make it through the past few months left me with little left to sit down and compose my thoughts. The second, and truly the biggest reason I haven’t been writing, is because I write my life and I just couldn’t share this part of my life on here. In time, I may find a way to share it. Partly, it’s not my story to tell, though I can share it from my perspective. I feel it is important to write it, not only as a form of catharsis, but also to help others. So, in time, you may learn more about my absence. It is a delicate balance to keep when sharing someone else’s health and life.

While I sort out how to express myself, while keeping those elements close(r) to my chest, I will be writing again. I hope to get some more material on BlogHer, I have my first post up at Nerdy But Flirty today, and I’ll be sharing a new chapter here as well. We are having a go at homeschooling. I’ll explain more in my first post–I plan to write at least once a week about our trials and errors, and our adventures too! It’s possible I’ll start a new Tumblr or use another blog for that, but for now, those posts will be here. As we sort out curriculum and hammer out details, I’m going to trial Time4Learning. Here is the disclaimer:

I’ve been invited to try Time4Learning for one month in exchange for a candid review. My opinion will be entirely my own, so be sure to come back and read about my experience. Time4Learning can be used as a homeschool curriculum, for afterschool enrichment and for summer skill sharpening. Find out how to write your own curriculum review for Time4Learning.

Stay tuned!

Also, thanks to everyone for sticking around, and for those who encouraged me during my absence. It meant so much to know my writing, my voice, was missed. xx